Rob Zombie Doesn't Have A Thing For Katherine Heigl

"I wouldn't know the cast of 'Grey's Anatomy' if I rammed them with my car." "Halloween" director/horror schlockster Rob Zombie proves he is wonderfully out of synch with pop culture. Zombie insists if there is another "Halloween" reboot sequel he won't be part of it. [MTV]

“We haven’t really heard him speak at length, so just to hear his voice is such a tremendous insight into his personality." - Due in October, Michael Azzerad's upcoming Kurt Cobain documentary, "Kurt Cobain: About a Son" features no Nirvana music and almost zero footage of the deceased grunge icon. [Rolling Stone]

Guy Ritchie is doing his best to make the world forget his "Swept Away" bomb. Not only is he directing the caper film, "RocknRolla," he is now set to helm, "Game Keeper, " a Virgin's Director's Cut comic line, with the concept created by Ritchie himself, but writing duties by Andy Diggle. The comic line also includes original titles from John Woo, Terry Gilliam, Shekhar Kapur, Jonathan Mostow, Ed Burns and Nicolas Cage. [Variety]

Film Festival Madness: I'm Not There, Tarantino, Darjeeling

If you haven't already heard, the upcoming Venice Film Festival (which runs August 29-September 8) unveiled its line-up which is going to premiere and showcase some much-sought after material.

Todd Hayne's Bob Dylan biopic "I'm Not There" (which we've kind of been obsessed with) will get its premiere at the festival along with Wes Anderson's "The Darjeeling Limited" (another film we've been pretty preoccupied with). Spoilers of all kinds, plus musical revelations will surely find their way onto the Interweb.

The Venice festival will also give cult-fetishist Quentin Tarantino a special sidebar showcase of his favorite genre (of the moment anyhow), Spaghetti Westerns (Westerns shot in Italy on the cheap in the '60s/early '70s marked by their low-budgetness, Clint Eastwood-ness and melodramatically overblown scores typically composed by Ennio Morricone). The motormouthed, hyperactive director will show over 30 films, including the lesser-known works of Giorgio Ferroni, Eugenio Martin (The Ugly Ones"); Riccardo Freda, Giorgio Capitani ("The Ruthless Four") and Pasquale Squitieri. Notably absent are the films of celebrated Spaghetti-Westerner Sergio Leone as the sidebar will focus on more obscure Italo-cowboy films (naturally, it is QT after all).

"A lot of directors who never got their due will now get their due," Tarantino told Reuters redundantly.

Other films competing for the Gold Lion award will be the new Kiera Knightly film, "Atonement," Brian DePalma's "Redacted," and new films by Ken Loach ("It's a Free World...") and Kenneth Branagh ("Sleuth"). Perennially goth director Tim Burton is expected to be honoured at the festival for his lifetime in film.

The Toronto International Film Festival
Meanwhile, the Toronto film festival (September 6-15) has added some notable films to its roster including the aforementioned "I'm Not There" (If European critics don't spoil it all, North American ones surely will),
plus Noah Baumbach's "Margot At The Wedding" and Sean Penn's Eddie Vedder songs-scored, "Into The Wild."

Also added to TIFF's lineup is Andrew Dominik's "The Assassination of Jesse James," starring Brad Pitt, Casey Affleck and the adorable Mary-Louise Parker; "Crash" director, Paul Haggis' "In the Valley of Elah"' with Charlize Theron and Tommy Lee Jones; and "The Savages" starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Laura Linney (its trailer features Spoon's "That's The Way We Get By" and Pinback singer Rob Crow's "Up").

Suffice to say we aren't going to either, but if there happens to be any of you out there that are and happen to see these films and want to contribute (especially keeping in mind the music of the films), feel free to email us.

The Fast And The Nerdiest: Comic-Con Hot Action AKA My Other Car Is A Millenium Falcon

Trying to keep up with Comic-Con - the holy land for failures of all plus-sized shapes - is like trying to master Tolkien's Elvish or learn fucking Klingon (it's impossible and no one with a life would ever bother).

For those of you who aren't familiar with comic-con, its a once a year affair where the species humongus dorkus emerges from its subterranean lair of solitude (parents basement) to gather in a socially awkward congregation to hear tid bits on movies and comics and while eating fistfuls of milk duds and whoppers, while the rest of the world pretends not to care but checks the information superhighway regularly for info and leaked videos.

Comic-Con also goes by fast and furious; it's a strange land where also-rans like Chuck Norris, George Takei, Ray Parker Jr. , Kenny Baker, Rob Zombie and the 2nd grip boy on"Labryinth" are demi-gods.

So far this went down:

- Iron Man unveiled its rough cut trailer (and some budget T-shirts). Jon Favreau came out with a camera and filmed the audience and said he was putting the clip up on YouTube immediately. Audiences who were filming onhand with the direct intention of posting every awkward pause and cough onto YouTube went wild and were immediately filled with knowing, gut-busting laughter.

- Warner Bros. producers revealed the new Blade Runner DVD, it's multiple geek-measuring editions and its bonanza of super extras.

- 20 minutes of some film we never heard about before until today, Beowulf, were screened.

- The new Spock was revealed for J.J Abrams upcoming Star Trek prequel (some dude from "Heroes"). It was also revealed that original Spock, Leonard Nimoy, would also make an appearance in the film. Losers rejoiced and hugged each other with tears in their eyes. "Thank God!" they exclaimed with do-or-die, relief.

- Indiana Jones filmmakers revealed that Karen Allen, the original damsel in distress in "Raiders of The Lost Ark" would return for the still untitled Indy 4. Not the worst casting move we've ever heard.

- J.J Abrams spoke about his oh-so-secret, apparently not titled 'Monstrous' monster film (you know they changed the film name the second the poster leaked). In a shameless bid at ingratiating himself with the non-existent life-trajectoried crowd Abrams said this generation needed its own beast. “We need our own Godzilla," he said to massive applause and serious, no-nonsense nod-heading agreement.

It didn't exactly happen at Comic-Con, but a lame teaser-trailer for Batman "Dark Knight" "leaked" online in shitty, shot-off-the-screen quality after some 6th level wizard filmed it off the screen and posted it on the YouTube. Don't get too excited, it's dialogue over a black screen, a slowly revealed Batman logo that eventually explodes and a blink-and-you'll-miss-it quick frame of the Joker is said conflagaration (the clip has naturally been taken down). Apparently, a bunch a new Dark Knight viral site has launched.

Comic-Con is a three-day long event, so expect more news of the nerd kind.

Can The Academy Ask For Their Awards Back Yet?

Have you seen the trailer for this new movie, "Stardust," that DeNiro is in? Seriously, between this, "Ronin," "Meet the Fokkers" (sic) and that one with the creepy kid, this guy has got to go. People actually touch each other on the nose in cute earnestness in this thing.

Also, what's with Michelle Pfeiffer (or however its spelled) finally crawling out from under that huge rock that Hollywood dropped on her after she starred in the mentally-challenged Academy-baiting "I Am Sam"? I wanted to punch that movie.

[ed. This post is by our new contributor Mr. Snrub, who is still trying to figure out how to use blogger and how to tie his shoes. You may see his brand of whimsy from time to time.]

Beowulf Trailer Springs 7th Grade Class Sweatpants Boners

The trailer for 'Beowulf' hit the interwebs earlier today (so in blog terms, 'like a million billion years ago'). Special effects dorks everywhere responded with 7th grade gym class sweatpants boners. Zemeckis has somehow managed to get rid of the creepy-mannequin look from 'Polar Express' and create impressively realistic CG people. Close inspection of this trailer reveals that Beowulf comes with the promise of swords, one of those Braveheart-type scenes where it rains millions of arrows and semi-naked CG Angelina Jolie. So basically when the movie comes out, the theater will look like this: Row after row of dudes in drawstring pants (every-other seat, of course!) using Twizzlers as a straw. For fantasy fans (and by that we mean virgins), Beowulf just might make up for having to watch Forrest Gump talk to a volleyball for 2 1/2 hours in that crappy-ass Zemeckis-directed Fed-Ex commercial. Not for us though, we still want a public apology and our 10 dollars back.

The trailer also appropriates some of John Murphy's Godspeed-like score from "28 Days Later."

All The Blade Runner You Will Ever Need For Life

Nerd mecca Comic Con is in full swing and details of the new "Blade Runner" DVD have been released and they are absolutely ridiculous - a full on panorama of extras in three massive editions.

The Everyday Movie Fan: Two-Disc Special Edition $20.97)

The Compulsive Nerd: Four-Disc Collector's Edition ($34.99 SRP)

The Get A Life Loser-thon: Five-Disc Ultimate Collector's Edition ($78.92 SRP) in Collectible "Deckard Briefcase" packaging with Harrison Ford's actual underwear from the movie which you can sniff to your hearts delight.

We love Blade Runner as much as the next guy, but we're most likely sticking to the two-disc edition, but we will say the Raymond Chandler voice-over that director Ridley Scott and most fans detest is severely underrated.

Fascinatingly dorky factoids:

- Notable actual locations were used to reflect 2019 Los Angeles, such as Union Station, 2nd Street tunnel and the Bradbury building.

- The top of Police Headquarters is actually part of the Mothership from Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

- In the last scene, Rutger Hauer made the jump between buildings himself.

- In the fight scene between Daryl Hannah and Harrison Ford, Hannah pulled Ford's nose so hard that his nose actually bled afterwards.

- Holding a dove, and letting it fly away, in the last scene was never in the script, but rather Rutger Hauer's idea when filming the scene (he's so poetic, that Mr. Hauer).

- Dangerous Days was originally the name of the script.

Said Sir Ridley Scott: "The Final Cut is the product of a process that began in early 2000 and continued off and on through seven years of intense research and meticulous restoration, technical challenges, amazing discoveries and new possibilities. I can now wholeheartedly say that Blade Runner: The Final Cut is my definitive director's cut of the film."

Jeff Baker, Warner Home Video Senior VP and General Manager, Theatrical Catalog and Domestic Sales, says: "25 years ago the critics said Blade Runner was ahead of its time and today it's still ahead of its time. This is clearly Ridley's signature film and we're delighted to offer these great editions to the Blade Runner fans who've been so patient, despite besieging us with thousands of annual requests in recent years for new DVDs. A number of people have told me that at the start of DVD, Blade Runner was absolutely the first title they wanted -- so much so that they purchased it even before their first DVD player! We think they'll agree that the new cut and the new editions are worth waiting for."

Translation: 40-year-olds living in their parents basement will be avoiding human interaction and the slim-to-dismal chance to ever procreate by playing with their Replicant action figures and this DVD for years to come.

The DVD comes out on December 18 and an exclusive New York/LA theatrical launch begins October 5.

Morning ShortCuts: Devo, The Hulk, Laszlo Kovacs RIP

"Their fanbase, being pretty cretinous, took it like a serious smackdown." - Longtime proponents of the deevolution theory, Devo calls out Korn on their use of the "Devolution: Nature’s U-Turn" fake film trailer and Korn fans naturally go apeshit with a barrage of hateful emails. "This is a perfect example of devolution," said Devo's Jerry Cassale. [Rolling Stone]

He passed away a few days ago, but we wanted to give him his due. Legendary Hungarian cinematographer Laszlo Kovacs died in his sleep on Saturday at the age of 74. The celebrated director of photography was a pioneer in the use of natural light and gave distinctive looks to many filmmakers from the '70s Hollywood New Wave including Bob Rafelson ("Five Easy Pieces"), Dennis Hopper ("Easy Riders") Martin Scorcese ("The Last Waltz"), Peter Bogdanovich, and Hal Ashby. "I think he's one of the great cameraman of the New Hollywood era," "Paper Moon" director Bogdanovich said. [International Herald Tribune]

Tim Blake Nelson (the houndog-faced Coen Brothers' favorite) has joined the cast of "forget-the-original-happened" "The Incredible Hulk" do-over. He apparently plays a scientist who is one of the green skinned behemoth's major antagonists. Which probably means more than just tickling him relentlessly. [Hollywood Reporter]

No justice in this world? Apparently Zach Braff earns $6.3 million a year for starring in the lowly-rated "Scrubs." [Vulture]

Let the Nerdathon commence. 20 minutes of "Beowulf" were screened at the geek mecca Comicon and thousands of comic-book store types jizzed themselves on the spot. [MTV] The film's new website is all up.

Who's Watching The Watchmen Cast?

The Watchmen movie finally has a confirmed cast and thank god for that cause we weren't going to bother following each and every rumor that was milling about (hello, Kate Winslet). A ton of other sites probably knew this days and weeks ago, but Warner Bros. finally announced what the world's nerds had already known. Patrick Wilson is the Nite Owl, Billy Crudup is Dr. Manhattan, Malin Akerman will play the Silk Spectre, Jackie Earle Haley will be Rorschach, Matthew Goode as Ozymandias, and Jeffrey Dean Morgan as the Comedian.

The cantankerous writer/artist and part-time magician and occultist, Alan Moore has naturally disavowed the project and once called the "Watchmen" comic completely un-cinematic. The man behind the uber-homoerotic beefcake-fest "300," Zack Snyder will helm the flick with all his bag of cinematic comic-book tricks in tow.

Moore told MTV in a 2006 interview. "I met [former attached director] Terry Gilliam, and he asked me, "How would you make a film of 'Watchmen'?" And I said, 'Don't.' "

Moore detests most adaptations of his comics, so why sell those right? Apparently D.C./Warner comics are out of his control. "When you're talking about things like "V for Vendetta" or "Watchmen," I don't have a choice. Those were works which DC Comics kind of tricked me out of, so they own all that stuff and it's up to them whether the film gets made or not."

Unbeknownst to Warner Bros. at the time, Snyder inserted a single frame test shot of Rorschach visible in a at 1:52 in the R-rated 300 trailer.

Criterion Provokes Nerd Boners; Xmas Comes Early

Speaking of Godard and Rialto... Holy boner city, Christmas is coming early. Jean Luc Godard's "Breathless" is finally getting the Criterion treatment. As is, Gus Van Sant's debut "Mala Noche" (which Rialto recently brought back to repertory theaters) AND Terrence Malick's "Days of Heaven," masterpiece. Cineastes are currently running to the bathroom to jerk off in massive anticipation. I think I will join this nerd circle-jerk. If the Rialto/Criterion mutual admiration society symbiosis continues, expect to (hopefully) see the return of Godard's "Two or Three Things I Know About Her" and Jean-Pierre Melville's crime noir, "Les Dolous."

Criterion rightfully says, There was before "Breathless," and there was after "Breathless." Jean-Paul Belmondo and Jean Seberg: greatest cinematic pair ever? Top 10 fer sure...
[Criterion]

Macho Cinema Returns; Old Feuds Reignite

"I will say, and this is for the record, Jean-Luc Godard may well be the third most awful man I've met in my life." - On the eve of his film retrospective at New York's Anthology Film Archive, Norman Mailer proves he's still not over what he perceives as Godard's butchering of his 1987 script of "King Lear." Mailer said he got along with Godard for about 24 hours and only made the deal in hopes for funding his own future films. [Vulture]

"He just turned it over to me and gave me a few bucks. I guess I’ll probably shoot it at the end of the day." - Beardy L.A. comedian Zach Galifianakis gets free creative reign over the Kanye West's "Can't Tell Me Nothing," alternate, for hipsters-only video and scores enough bread for sandwiches and a few beers. Also? Galifianakis is in Sean Penn's upcoming "Into The Wild"? Maybe he hung out with Eddie Vedder. [Imposed]

The Museum of Modern Art is celebrating the painfully tasteful film excavators Rialto Pictures, and thank god for that. Rialto work closely with equally artful tastemakers, the Criterion Collection to bring you the finest in film snob cinema. Without them, you'd still be watching "Back To The Future II" all day (which you probably do anyhow). [AP]

No.5 is alive and can be yours for $100,000 on Ebay. Hello, Johnny 5? The stupid '80s robot movie with Steve Guttenberg? Yeah, now that's a fucking masterpiece, right? Just don't disassemble.[Vulture]

Kanye West Apes Fiona Apple Video With Zach Galifianakis

Ahh, Kayne West, you super appropriator you. Kanye's new alternate version video for "Can't Tell Me Nothing" stars bearded, pudgy comedian Zach Galifianakis in the exact, Zach-lip-synch's-the-words way Fiona Apple used Zach in her, "Not About Love" video from 2006.

Maybe even weirder than Kanye directly aping someone else's idea (what's strange about that?) is the inclusion of filthy-minded appalachian indie-rocker Will Oldham in the video.

Sadly, this seems like Kanye's pathetic hipster bid to appeal to the all-things-loving-indie Stereogum set. Watch for it on that site, Brooklyn Vegan and Pitchfork in reverent tones in about 5 minutes.

Watch: Kanye West - "Can't Tell Me Nothing" (alt video version)
Watch: Fiona Apple - "Not About Love"
Download: Kanye West - "Can't Tell Me Nothing" (feat Young Jeezy remix)
Download: Fiona Apple - "Not About Love" (Jon Brion version)

Did Scorsese Stimulate Anderson's Darjeeling Fetish?

The trailer for Wes Anderson's "The Darjeeling Limited" has all the fairweather cineastes abuzz. Fans asked themselves, will this one be better than the poorly received, "The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou"? Will Anderson continue to burrow down the wormhole of self-indulgence, ornate pageantry and wacky ensembles? And similar question of equal nerdiness.

All of it reminds us of an October 2002 article in Premiere magazine with Anderson and his directorial idol and pal Martin Scorsese. In the piece, the cinema scholarly Scorsese first screened French director Jean Renoir's first color film, "The River" – which was set in India – to the impressionable Anderson. The piece reads:

"Scorsese recently screened one of the more sumptuous of [Jean] Renoir's English-language films -"The River," a beautiful technicolor vision shot in India - for Anderson. "I thought he would respond to it. You know, who knows what that will set off in his mind, maybe he'll make another three films from it."

A big fan of Anderson's debut, "Bottle Rocket," Scorsese famously dubbed the Texan-born director "the next Scorsese" in an article he wrote for Esquire magazine in March of 2000. Could the seminal Italian director's screening directly influenced Wes? Maybe something was set off his mind?

It's interesting that Scorsese screened that particular film in 2002. In the same Esquire article two years earlier Marty wrote about what he felt were their similarities.

"Wes ... has a very special kind of talent. This kind of sensibility is rare in movies. Jean Renoir. comes to mind. I remember seeing Renoir's films as a child and immediately feeling connected to the characters through his love for them. It's the same with Anderson."

The original Premiere article can be read in two parts here and here. Or simply the cached google fan-typed version here.

Green Days Get Simpsonzied, Jezebel Are Stupid, Carlos D Becomes A Star?

A clip of Green Day performing the Danny Elfman-composed Simpsons theme from the new animated feature has been played by some L.A. radio boobs and then preserved by some interweb fan. Warning these vilest of idiot morning jocks talk all over this song. God, they should be scorched off the face of the earth. What a reptilian species they are. PS, this version isn't on the film's soundtrack. [Pretty Much Amazing]

Proving they know jackshit about female rockers, the idiots over at feminist manicure blog, Jezebel found a random British Vogue and assumed the model on the cover is British waif-rocker PJ Harvey. Ummm, no. Not even fucking close. [Jezebel]

Multi-hyphenate renaissance man, bassist/douchebag/composer and now actor, Carlos D. of Interpol is shooting a thriller in Chicago, called "My Friends Told Me About You," which he is producing, starring in and, "most likely, scoring." The film is directed by Daniel Ryan, the guy who directed "Golgotha," a short film that Dengler scored. [Time Out Chicago]

- Exciting news. "Southland Tales," the long-awaited and then shelved follow-up to Richard Kelly's "Donnie Darko," will finally see a proper theatrical release in the U.S. on November 9. The film, about a near-apocalyptic future Los Angeles tanked at Cannes in 2006 and stars The Rock, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and Justin Timberlake, and is allegedly pretty strange if the cast wasn't already a big flaming indicator. [Variety]

Hippie circus rockers, Man Man have written a version of the "Weeds" theme song, "Little Boxes." Other people contributing covers of the theme for the 3rd season of the pot-friendly Showtime drama include the Shins, Donovan, Joan Baez, Randy Newman, Billy Bob Thornton, Kinky, and Michael Franti. [Pitchfork]

Is this the gothic and pretentious new opening for the "Blade Runner: Final Cut" real? Or is it a fake? [Big Screen Little Screen]

Download: Green Day - "The Simpsons Theme Song (Clip)"
Download: PJ Harvey - "You Said Something"
Download: Interpol - "Next Exit"
Download: The Shins - Red Rabits

Things We Already Knew: "I'm Not There": November Release

You know someone's going to make a headline out of this, so why don't we already. You know we mentioned to everyone almost two weeks ago that "I'm Not There" the Dylan biopic was moved to a November 21 release date (not the Sept date that everyone else was reporting), but since the wildly innacurate IMDB wasn't reporting Nov 21, the rest of you lemmings didn't either. Well guess what? Today they did. Welcome to last Tuesday.

The Darjeeling Limited Trailer Gets Kinky

Now that's a good coup. Apple Gorilla Vs. Bear has scooped us all with has the trailer for "The Darjeeling Limited." The trailer is supposed to appear this upcoming weekend in front of "Once" and other indie-centric films, but GVsB Apple has beaten all to the punch. The trailer utilizes one of Anderson's faves, The Kinks', "This Time Tomorrow" and "Strangers" (both from the album Lola vs Powerman And The Moneygoround). This means we're going to have to turn around our "If I Were Wes Anderson" soundtrack series playlist right quick like.

Update: I'm slightly wrong, Apple trailers got the "Darjeeling' first look, but props to GVsB to for noticing right quick and finding the 'Time' mp3.

As we mentioned over the weekend, the film will be using music from the films of Satyajit Ray and Merchant Ivory, and the use of the Kinks in the trailer is hopeful for British Invasion fans, but that doesn't necessarily mean there's going to be a wide spectrum of pop music in the film. Then again it doesn't mean there won't be either. Dare to speculate. Either way, it appears that longtime composer Mark Mothersbaugh isn't contributing to the film this time if the movie poster and trailer credits are any indication.

Will It Be Good This Time?
There's been a lot of finger pointing and blame at Anderson's last and much-maligned feature, 'The Life Aquatic' which fans generally agree is his weakest work to date (Steely Dan agree too). Slate went so far as to posit whether Owen Wilson's absence as a co-writer on the film was the reason the film failed (Wilson, busy being a movie star was unavailable, Anderson instead collaborated with "Squid and the Whale" writer/director Noah Baumbach) and as far fetched as that sounds on the outset (that surfer blond dude?), they make a very strong argument (they call their "headbutting" collaboration sort-of akin to the genius of Lennon and McCartney). But the erudite Baumbach is no slouch either. Written by Anderson, Roman Coppola and Jason Schwartzman this time, script reviews of this film have been unfavorable (though the script in questions seems to have changed greatly) and one early review called it Anderson's most "surreal" film to date.

Either way, we'll all find out soon; September 29 is not that far away.

Say What?: Lily Allen, Matt Damon

"One night with her made me realize why Kurt [Cobain] killed himself.” - Delightfully untactful rascal Lily Allen might have finally taken her wicked tongue too far. After one night hanging out with trainwreck Courtney Love the profane tart also allegedly added, "I nearly checked into rehab."[Gigwise]

Meanwhile, the Kurt Cobain documentary, "Kurt Cobain: About A Son," will get its theatrical release in October. [The Daily Swarm].

"Bond is part of the system. He's an imperialist and a misogynist, and he laughts at killing people. Bourne is a guy who is against the establishment, who is paranoid and on the run. I just think fundamentally they're just very different things." - No matter how hard the James Bond series tries to rip of the Bourne franchise, Matt Damon understands that his secret agent story is always going to have the realistic leg up. [GQ via Us Weekly]

Duly Noted: Pitchfork, Drew Carey, Iron Man, Matt Damon

"Now we've seen everything." - Wide-eyed Pitchfork scribe Paul Thompson, having never left the safety of his parent's basement and never experienced life outside of a handful of indie-rock records is genuinely marveled at the sight of seeing the curtain pulled back on the amazing lives of indie-rockers the Arcade Fire playing basketball. [Pitchfork]

"How do you know [about that]?" - A audibly upset and taken aback Avi Arad - Marvel Studios mega-producer - inadvertently confirms both horsefaced actress Hilary Swank and Samuel L. Jackson as having appearances in "Iron Man." [MTV]

"It fit my protocol or my principles: fun, easy to do, not work." - Excruciatingly unfunny lardass Drew Carey, gives a smug smirk knowing fully well he will make outrageous bank for doing next to nothing as the new host of "The Price Is Right." [Variety]

"[Drew Carey's] endearing and really great with improv." - CBS Entertainment prexy Nina Tassler proves she is deaf, dumb, blind and has cancerously awful taste by lauding the worst show to ever appear on television, Carey's improv-doofus monstrosity, "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" [Variety]

Indie-Rockers - They're Just Like US!

Episode #53 in the ongoing in-depth reportage of indie-rock publications (Pitchfork, Brooklyn Vegan) closely following and enthusiastically charting the completely prosaic and mundane life of their indie-rock idols (not to mention closely resembling US Weekly). This ridiculous installment has the Arcade Fire engaged in an emotional match of basketball.

Next week, the National go grocery shopping... Sadly, no this isn't a slow news day. Brooklyn Vegan actually stopped the presses to report about Takka Takka's self-made Simpsons likenesses. Someone stop the bleeding.

The National actually played Clap Your Hands Say Yeah in a rousing game of footie once and Brooklyn Vegan sent down it's crack paparrazi team to document the thrilling event.

Preview: "The Hottest State"

From the outside, “The Hottest State,” is yet another coming-of-age tale from a heartbroken, self-centered male with all the woe-is-me navel gazing you might expect from a center of the universe 20-something.

Yet, while baring all these clichés and characteristics initially, Ethan Hawke’s sophomore feature-length directorial effort based on his debut 1997 novel, slowly evolves into a very real and very affecting bittersweet memoir (though some are going to naturally find it self-involved and whiny and some degree, we suppose it can be at times).

Mark Weber plays the Hawke surrogate saddled with some serious father issues, now that the "Reality Bites" star has started to gray and beginning to encroach on his ‘40s (we figured he was 40 by now) . While the early accusations against Hawke’s novel were barbs of pretentiousness, “The Hottest State” film accurately captures the 20-something sense of crushed affections and unrequited love; and how these all-consuming emotional debilitations can knock our lives off track – at least temporarily.

Catalina Sandino Moreno plays the ambitious, aloof and out-of-reach object of Weber's affection (a hipster Mexican singer/songwriter) and Michelle Williams (looking ever so lovely) plays Weber's ex, willing to throw herself at him if any opportunity arises.

Much has been made about "The Hottest State" soundtrack all the hipster indie-rock bands (Bright Eyes, Cat Power, Feist) that contributed covers to the film's score – written by the film's principal songwriter and composer, Jesse Harris (the songwriter behind Nora Jones' multiple Grammy award-winning debut album), but it's Harris and the lesser known songs by Argentinean newcomer Rocha (lip-synced in the film by Moreno) that truly act as the film's musical backbone (the Willie Nelson cover is also prominently featured, but try spotting your indie-faves and you might have a difficult time).

Harris (who has a small role as, what else, a singer/songwriter) wrote about "Morning in a Strange City (Cafe)" – the score piece that acts as the film's main theme and plays numerous times throughout. It has a nice, melancholy, half-defeated, half I'm-not-giving-up feel to it with accordians, marimbas trumpets and earthy Latin textures. “That melody is a theme that runs through the entire sequence of the film that takes place in Mexico," he said. "We did five different versions of the melody, and this is the mellow version where they’re having dinner in a restaurant, drinking tequila, and then the trumpet comes in when they go to the bathroom together."

Longtime friends, Harris and Hawke didn't have much of a problem coming up with a direction for the soundtrack.

“The more we talked about it, the more we thought it would be cool to score the film with different singers doing my songs," Harris said. "Beyond that, I would sing my own tunes as a character in the film, write the songs for the character Sarah to sing and compose the instrumental score. Everything would be newly recorded for the movie."

Eleven of the 18 songs on the soundtrack album originally appeared on one of Harris’ albums.
Download: Jesse Harris - "Morning In A Strange City (Cafe)"
Download: Rocha - "Ya No Te Veria Mas (Never See You)"
Download: Feist - "Somewhere Down The Road"
Watch: "The Hottest State" trailer

Maggie Gyllenhaal Disses Katie Holmes In Batman Role?

Let the acting cat fight begin, right? The National Ledger and other sources are re-reporting a Contact Music UK (an irreputable, inflammatory and sensationlist British rag) interview with Maggie Gyllenhaal where the actress apparently knocks on Katie Holmes in the original "Batman Begins."

First off, remember who Contact Music is, secondly the Ledger piece tries to be just as provocative and a lot of these quotes feel extremely taken out of context, but that's the British press for you.

Trying to start beef. Contact Music ran this quote:

"I'm not thinking of it as a role that anyone's played before. I'm not walking into Katie Holmes' performance. I'm thinking of it as an opportunity to play somebody who's alive and smart. Chris asked me to do this because he wanted me, not because he wants some generic lady in a dress."

And now everyone is speculating that this is a not-so-thinly veiled dig on Holmes. It just seems like stirring the pot nonsense, but it is what is is. Entering the Holmes-Cruise sphere always gets the media salivating for a good juicy story that usually isn't there. Look for a response or a clarification later in the day when it gets picked up and naturally out of hand.

"I'm Not There" Mystery Man Revealed? Not John Lennon? Not Quite

In some smaller geek circles (read: Dylan obsessives) there's been some intense speculation who the character next to Cate Blanchett's Bob Dylan surrogate is in the recently leaked, "I'm Not There" clip (let's face it, this clip is supposed to be viral and if it wasn't it would've been yanked by now).

Many originally thought the character was supposed to be John Lennon because of the characters' "Groovy forehead and curly hair - take Zoomdon!" dialogue is a Lennon witticism from the famous Lennon vs Dylan limo ride in the Dylan documentary, "Eat The Document," (some of the film's footage was utilized for Martin Scorsese's Dylan doc, "No Direction Home."

Other said it was "flamingly obvious" that the character was supposed to be Dylan's mid-sixties perennial sidekick Bob Neuwirth who appeared in D.A Pennebaker's "Dont Look Back" and Dylan's own surrealist movie, "Renaldo and Clara."

But in true "I'm Not There" Todd Haynes impressionistic fashion, the character is actually supposed to be a composite of both figures.

The character in the car next to Cate Blanchett is played by actor Joe Cobden, according to his myspace page his character (Sonny) is based loosely on Bob Neuwirth.

So we emailed Cobden and grilled him a little bit closer. He responded with this terse, but congenial answer:

"It's supposed to be a composite of Neuwirth and whoever else was hangin' around him at the time. I'm spoofing Lennon though, and the Yorkshire accent a bit, at the beginning."

To Dylan obsessives, all of this is pretty obvious and yes, makes a lot of sense, but we wanted to talk to Cobden before we posted anything. As one Dylan-ite perfectly stated in our comments section, "Most of the dialogue in the leaked clip is taken from actual interviews, press conferences, film clips etc. [and] if Haynes keeps this up for the whole movie then it will be one big game for serious Dylan nuts."

Indeed. Thanks to all those that contributed and put in their comments and two cents.

Download: Bob Dylan - "I'm Not There"
Download: Bob Dylan "She's Your Lover Now"
Download: Bob Dylan - Señor (Tales of Yankee Power)"
Download: Bob Dylan - "Ballad Of a Thin Man"

Heard 'Em Say: Weekend Edition, Gene Simmons, Robert Smith, Jeff Tweedy

"[I] don't believe there's any difference between a monogamous and a polygamous relationship. Those are all just big words, like 'gymnasium.'" — Once you exceed three syllables Gene Simmons becomes confused, believes you are entering brain surgeon territory and logical faculties begin to break down. [TV Guide]

"I was encouraged to issue a denial, but I thought, why? I don't deny anything. I don't see the point. I've worked with lots of different people down the years." — Having knowingly worked with Korn and assclowns of all shapes and sizes, the Cure's Robert Smith sees no wrongdoing in adding one more blemish (Ashlee Simpson) to his tarnished late-era career. [Pitchfork]

"I read a lot about [Grizzly Bear] but resisted [them] based on the snide expression on a couple of their faces in a magazine. I can’t get past those first impressions easily." — Wilco's Jeff Tweedy reveals, like any good myopic indie-rocker worth his salt, he will judge a book by its cover. [New York Times]

"Cartooning is for people who can’t quite draw and can’t quite write. You combine the two half-talents and come up with a career." — Simpsons creator Matt Groening is fabulously wealthy, yet still surprisingly in touch with self-awareness [NY Times]

"After 30 years in a band together we are very disappointed that Hooky has decided to go to the press and announce unilaterally that New Order have split up. We would have hoped that he could have approached us personally first. He does not speak for all the band, therefore we can only assume he no longer wants to be a part of New Order." — The remaining members of New Order issue a newsflash to now-former bass player Peter Hook that translates something closely to this: "Just cause you're leaving doesn't mean our band is through, you wanker." [NME]

Download: Wilco - "Either Way"
Download: Grizzly Bear - "He Hit Me (It Felt Like A Kiss)"
Download: New Order - "Leave Me Alone"
Download: The Cure - "Japanese Whispers"

Short Cuts: The Cure, Manu Chao, Errol Morris

The Cure will begin working on a career-spanning documentary that will showcase Robert Smith ever-expanding and prosperous waistline, plus the yearly increasing embarrassment of aging and still dressing like a 14-year-old emo kid. The documentary will come out in 2009 in tandem with the Cure's 30th anniversary and Smith's promised new fighting weight of 300lbs. [Billboard]

One of our favorite foreign directors, Bosnian/Serb filmmaker,"Emir Kusturica ("Underground," "Black Cat, White Cat") is making a documentary about once legendary, now bloated and coked-up disgraced Argentinian soccer player Diego Maradona. Argentinian folk singer Manu Chao will appear in the film and contribute songs to the to the movie, as will longtime Kusturica musical contributors, Yugoslav-era'd rock band The Smoking Orchestra. Kusturica also directed the video for Chao's "Rainin in Paradize." [Dhenin]

Nebbish and erudite documentary filmmaker Errol Morris ("The Fog of War") has a blog at the New York Times. It's called Zoom. Expect many laborious Marshall Mcluhan-esque posts about objective and subjective realities. Zzzzzz. [Zoom]

Fomer Irishy rapper turned white-trash bluesman, Everlast has written the theme song to the show, "Saving Grace." [IGN]

"Basically, it's about putting to the test the idea of this liberal democrat that we all claim to be. All great space movies that I love, like Alien, are built on that dynamic." "Sunshine" director Danny Boyle likes to constantly put his characters in a moral conundrum, i.e, likes to fuck with audiences in every which way he can. [New York Mag]

If the Arch Angel of Satanic retribution has his way, there will be a "Family Guy" movie. [Associated Press]

This little book called "Harry Potter" broke all kinds of sales records this weekend. The book averaged more than 5,000 sales a minute. [AP]

Download: The Cure - "Play For Today"
Download: Manu Chao - "Rainin In Paradize"
Download: Everlast - "The Rhythm"